that old feeling, again

the holidays are upon us...after Halloween it seems to be all down hill. the next couple of months 'moosh together and blur the holidays between them like a big smudge.

My mother's family (the side i know best) is not what could be known as traditionalists. we are more going through the motions than vying for religious meaning. i have yet to have a traditional anything. well, that's not entirely true still every holiday has lost its true meaning (sorta).

no holiday is complete without Tequila

over the years, my views of holidays have changed. mainly since i'm on the other end of the whole ordeal. im planning, paying and panicking thus, i hate the holidays. never thought i would be one to say it but i do. i can be lumped into the group of getting the holiday blues. in the history of my family, i can not recall a Norman Rockwell kind of holiday. to me, holidays are just an excuse to spend money, gorge ourselves out our ideal pant size, and drinking ourselves to oblivion.

i remember one Christmas like this
growing up

i can almost see why my mom drudged through them granted she half-assed it. growing up, we really didn't have much money but somehow my mom made things work. we didn't know any better so we were excited and happy, till we did know better and well things got dicey.

so, back to thanksgiving.

last year i made a turkey

thanksgiving is the next holiday on my list. its a crappy holiday since i hate to cook but like to eat, on the other hand, i love to experiment with food but its just an excuse for me to to try something new and passive aggressively irk my mother. this years turkey is gonna be cooked in champagne (my totally favorite alcohol).

and a ham

as traditions go, we have a turkey (usually dry) and my gramma prepares her usual stuffing, from scratch and memory (i am one of the few that is not a fan of her stuffing, this has almost gotten me excommunicated). there is also an array of food that is a staple, fruit salad is one that i always associate with Thanksgiving. of course, there are pies of all different flavors even pumpkin (another dish i dislike). and side dishes galore, since my grandfather's passing no one has attempted to make candied yams (yuck).

once again i have taken it upon myself to make a turkey and a few other items. my mother, (another non-fan of cooking) finds it a relief that she will not cook this year. she usually has a hand in helping with the stuffing, because it takes everyone to make gramma's stuffing. even i have helped (still dont care for it).

so, what is my beef with the holidays? 

after rambling away about thanksgiving i haven't gotten to my point. i hate getting off my lazy ass, period. but now i feel an obligation to do so, if not for the sake of my taste palate for the sake of my little crumbsnatcher. i don't want her to feel as indifferent about the holidays as i do. my mother never cooked a turkey as long as i remember and Christmas was all about getting the tree up and counting down the days till we could open presents (another tradition that my mother's family has instilled).

so why so bummed?

Karma had it in for me
when she blessed me with a child

well, thanksgiving is less of a hassle than the others. it really only requires cooking and eating and cleaning and if you are lucky drinking followed by bickering and a possible massive hangover come black Friday (another holiday i dont participate in). but when people start getting ready for Christmas earlier and earlier each year it makes me want to take a holiday from the bullshit.

i once resented Jehovah Witnesses for not celebrating holidays but now i think they are onto something or could it just be laziness?? im not sure but it's looking tempting. i would love to give up the holidays but the public mainstream wont let me and on top of it all my crumbsnatcher's birthday lands on one of my few fave holidays.

New Year's Eve. 

happy NEW YEAR!!

as a result, i have to go through the motions celebrate the inane holidays i despise and show my crumbsnatcher that there is something to celebrate. but i don't have to be traditional about them though, I am pagan after all.